The District of North Vancouver is tossing around names for two North Vancouver communities–communities that already have names, but apparently the names aren’t spiffy enough to justly represent the epic redevelopment they’re about to endure.
These are the vital aspects of municipal politics, people.
District Council has narrowed it down to two names for each community: Lower Capilano will either be “Lions Gate Village” or “Capilano Village” and Seylynn will be known as the “Bridges District” or “Lynn Bridges”.
Again, I’d like to remind readers how serious this task is. These names aren’t just names. They’re NEW NAMES. A fresh start! A clean slate!
If Seylynn is Bruce Jenner, then Lynn Bridges is Caitlyn Jenner.
In the spirit of re-christening these existing communities with existing names, I’d like to throw out a few suggestions:
Lower Capilano
South West North Vancouver Village
Capilano Township
Klahanie Cocoon
Tin Palace Stumble
Denny’s Den
Lions Gate Bridge Off-Ramp Valley
Capilano Crossing
Smog Town
Seylynn
Lynn Bin
Lynnley Land
Georgetown
Toby’s Armpit
Toby’s Crotch
(really any crevasse belonging to Toby is solid)
Six Bridges
Infinite Construction Site
What do YOU think we should name these communities?
A North Van local with a fetish for cheap wine and words. As editor, his job is to make sure that everything posted is useful, entertaining or awesome.
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